reflections

I'd like to start this blog by saying that the older I get the more comfortable I am admitting that I don't know as much as I once thought...but I'm not stupid either.
My dad passed away on June 17th - it took me almost 14 years to find my dad and I was truly blessed to have 13 years with him - and I miss him every minute - but I'm trying to be strong for my mom and remember the good times.

Loosing someone you love sucks - really bad sucks, but if you are me, you believe that God has a true and pure purpose for each of us on this earth and when we are through with His purpose on earth then he brings us to spend eternity with him in Heaven.
Once when discussing this topic with my parents ...well I need to take about 3 steps back to introduce this story -
I ramble and sometimes get on tangents about meaningless topics, but people listen, so whatever, but I was ranting about how I think that when I make it to Heaven I'm going to ask God 3 questions - I don't know where I came up with this, I made it up and have said it enough that I have convinced myself it's trut - but I was disscussing my question (I have only settled on 1 thus far in my life) - which is 'what are misquitos for?' - I don't like a lot of things on earth; snakes, rats, roaches, etc, but I understand their purpose in the circle of life - misquitos are a perpetual mystery...so that's question 1.
In a response to my rant about misquitos Ken said "If I get to Heaven I'm going to go find a corner to sit in, under an umbrella, with my Charlie dog and I'm going to hope no one notices me...in case it's a mistake that I'm there."

I assure you it is no mistake he's in Heaven. Ken Hoots was an amazing man who taught me the best lesson dad's ever teach daughters...and that lesson is that YOU ARE WORTH IT.
Women are hard on themselves, I am, my friends are - but the truth is, we are all worth the love, and partnership and support of a lifetime partner.
I'm still waiting on mine - I just trust that God isn't done with me yet...or him.

Either way, I know it'll be worth the wait.

blogging = journaling?

I was never very good at keeping a journal. I believe it was due to the incesant desire to have a pretty notebook - so I'd write for a week then have messy handwriting and start over. Then over the course of moving 2 dozen times in my life those few pages of memories lost their value - and are thus lost. Sad I suppose - but nothing to be done.
I figure this way my handwriting will never matter - and no matter how many times I move I won't have to pack these thoughts.
I'm about to run - just a short start this time, but for those of you that start reading this please note:
I write like I talk - and some where, at some point in my educational past I had a teacher that told me to put a comma where I would take a breath...of all the things that stuck with me this thought seems to be attached with gorilla glue.
While I was an English minor I can't diagram a sentence or even have a real conversation about grammar above the 9th or 10th grade level - my strength was writing (with an editor) and literature. I love to read and analyze...thus my gift to you.